Sunday, September 24, 2006

Oh, and I just bought this belt buckle:

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I may be turning into a diva-obsessed monster-faggot. But then again, all of my pants need extensive belting...
Lord knows that I love me some Chick Tracts. My own vast collection reamins in Seattle, but Mr. Chick's online presence satisfies me when I'm jonsing for Jebus here in NYC.

Great news from Jack T. Chick!

All your faves have been redrawn AND rewritten for those of a duskier bent:

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Beginning this month, we are rolling out a new tract series with the same story but with black characters. We have taken some of our most popular Chick tracts and redrawn them with black characters. To avoid confusion in ordering, we have renamed them. Somebody Loves Me is called Hard Times.

Does this strike anyone else as creepy?

Maybe if all the lord-lubbers can be kept busy with ridiculous factionism, I will finally be free to marry a dog. Hallelujah.

Proof of a higher power

Look what landed on Youtube:

Thank-you, Fourfour

Saturday, September 23, 2006

I'm a Furniture Hobo

Last night, after seeing the phenominal Jeffery Lewis Band and slumming it grand with new and amazing colleague Victoria, I encountered this in a garbage pile outside my glamorous Inwood apartment building:

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It was full of filth, and smelled like it had spent the 60-something years since its manufacture inside a cigar bar. Still, I loved its sexy rounded corners and deco handle, so I dragged it inside.

This morning, I hoofed it to my workshop for some rehab. It turned out that under the cigar-tar, the entire thing had been wrapped in gold-flecked contact paper:

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It's barely visible, but it was super dramatic at the time.

I peeled the crap off, stripped the paint, sanded it for consistant texure, and gave it a coat of paste wax.

I am quite happy with my new-n-free arts-n-crafts armoir:

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Friday, September 22, 2006

To the snark-ass who anonymously e-mailed me about the tortoise shell sconce:

If you're so concerned about lack of respect for the dead, why don't you go after the Gap's current skinny black pant campaign?

Even if the Gap is "making a generous contribution to the Audrey Hepburn Children's Fund in celebration of the launch of the Keep It Simple ad campaign," I don't think Audrey Hepburn would have wiped her skinny white can with those skinny black pants.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

What have you been making, Jake?

I'm on another lamp kick. Last week, I was recovering shades in watermarked faille and Tyvek, but yesterday I kicked into high gear:

Shortly before I left our fantastic, cheap apartment on 18th Avenue, I came upon a large tortise shell on the building free table. Not knowing exactly why, I grabbed it. It sat in a storage box for a couple of years before I shipped it to New York.

Yesterday, it was reborn:

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I can't sell it, but I can own it.

I'm sure that some will question my morals for using part of a dead endangered species. I invite them to make a clever craft out of my corpse when the time comes.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

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I didn't make this, but damn, I wish I had...

Monday, September 18, 2006

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

It will be mine...

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Oh, yes, it wll.

Monday, September 11, 2006

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From the American Crafts Festival.

None of the displayed jewelry-like items were even close to a hoot.